Whether you meditated for the first or millionth time today or are simply thinking about maybe giving it a try, it is good to review a few key points about beginning your practice. In any case, we’re all starting over right now. So this is the first time for all of us, myself included.
There are basic 4 points to keep in mind.
- The meditation practice that we do is called Shamatha. Shamatha is a Sanksrit word that means The Practice of Calm Abiding or The Practice of Tranquility. Which sounds pretty great, but also pretty impossible. I mean, we’re all so busy and so stressed. You might think that in order to peacefully abide, you’d have to get through your to-do list, fly to the Caribbean, or at least turn out all the lights and bolt the door. Au contraire. There is a place that is always available to you for peaceful abiding and that is in your own mind. “Not bloody likely” you may say to yourself, “that’s where all the anxiety is in the first place.” Well maybe so, on one very conventional and mundane level. But on another, once you relax, you see that your mind is so much vaster and more beautiful and brilliant than you ever imagined, and that your stresses are only a piece of the landscape.
- Meditation practice is about the placement of attention. All it is, is substituting for your discursive mind (you know, the you that is always going “I have so much to do, We need a new dishwasher, Does my butt look fat in this, Should I break up with my girlfriend, I wish I spoke Mandarin…” and so on) another object of attention. In our practice, that object is your breath. Now, what is this mysterious attention? How do you locate it and how do you determine where to place it? It is quite simple. Right now, without moving or looking, place your attention on your left big toe. You can do it, right? Now, without moving or looking, place it on your right earlobe. Doable, right? Now, pitch it behind you. Place it on the tip of your nose. Each time you switch location, something within you moves. That something is your attention. That is what you place on breath during practice.
- The biggest misconception of all time about meditation is that it means you’re supposed to stop thinking and “clear the mind of thought.” Your mind exists to produce thought and trying to make it stop would be like opening your eyes and telling them not to see. Try to look out through your eyes and not see anything. It’s very frustrating. And, really, not very practical. Our practice is actually quite practical. Rather than teaching you how to stop thinking (or think only happy thoughts), it teaches you how to relax with all of your thoughts exactly as they are and remain open minded, clear-eyed and softhearted. Now that is practical.
- The #1 problem most of us bring to our practice is the tendency to make it more complicated than it really is. This practice is more than 2,500 years old. It has been used by countless individuals over the millennia and while I’m not saying it’s for everyone, I am saying that you can trust it completely. It has been honed and perfected and remarked upon by the most brilliant minds imaginable. Zillions of people just like you and me have both screwed it up completely and used it to transcend the wheel of suffering. We can learn from all of them. No aspect of the technique is there without reason. So, if you catch yourself saying, “well this eyes-open thing doesn’t make sense, so I’ll just close mine” or “she says we should let thoughts go, but that one was too important and I’m going to write it down,” take a pause. Reapply the technique. Resist attempts to embellish or remake it, at least for a few lifetimes—you know, until you really know the practice inside and out. Though meditation isn’t easy, it is very, very simple. So when in doubt, do less. Apply the technique wholeheartedly. And get ready for your life to change.
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Hi Susan! Thank you for the reminder of basic instruction.
I continue to meditate each morning 15-22 minutes. And I guess part of me was believing (maybe still does) that I’m much more relaxed, at peace – well, less stressed! – than before I began meditating 14 months ago.
However, this morning I had an experience that was not fun and made me question the effectiveness of my meditation practice. I had to go to the IRS building downtown and pick up a 1099 form. I should have realized that I was starting from a tense place just by having to go downtown to the IRS building. I started out frustrated that I couldn’t find the forms at my local library or post office, where the 1040s are.
Then when I got there, I found a 15-min parking spot, went to the 13th floor for the forms, thinking I just have to run in and pick up a form off the stack available. No. I get to the 13th floor and have to go through a metal detector, get in a line of about 10 people to ask a woman behind the desk for the form. How hard could they make this process?!
I tried to engage the people in line with me about the unfairness of this process. Woman right behind me just gazed at me with a sort of understanding, but did not engage. Then it hit me. I could focus on what I perceive to be my problems (IRS, system, etc) or I could focus on my breath.
Wow! so simple. so powerful.
I can’t say that I was at peace when I got to the counter to request my form, but I hope I was less angry. At least I didn’t say the things I had been imagining saying to the desk clerk. It wasn’t perfect. But it could have been so much worse.
Thanks for letting me share my story (and vent a little)
I’m glad you keep sharing yours.
An excellent story. And a great insight into how your mind just starts to work differently once you develop a practice. Just as you point out, problems don’t disappear–I mean we’re only human here–but the repertoire of responses increases. Which is a beautiful thing. Thanks so much for this peek into your practice.
Susan, Thank you for the reminder that meditation is not about making everything in our mind either blank or Nirvana. I struggle with being accepting of what is happening for me emotionally and mentally (perfectionistic? nah!). Your guidance in my practice helps me internalize self acceptance and compassion better than any other teacher I have worked with. Thank you.
My fellow Susan, I am so glad to hear this.
We are so hard on ourselves! It is such a relief to lighten up a bit and extend some tenderness toward ourselves. xo Susan
It’s been just a week that I’ve begun to meditate with you. I’ve experimented with meditating before but didn’t stay with it because I was restless. You have the gift at teaching it that really helps me understand how to be in the tranquil state this Shamatha practice allows. I am sharing your Open Heart Project with family and really enjoy it’s rewarding effect of peace and ease it has on me.
Thank you so much!
Hi Colleen. I’m so thrilled you are enjoying the OHP and deriving benefit from it. It means so much to know that! With love, Susan
I am brand new to Shambatha meditation — learning it from you – and am finding it wonderful for my crazy-busy lifestyle. I crave it every day for the peace it provides me. My problem is when I am on the road. At home, I have found a small place that “feels like home” when I sit on my pillow and ready myself for a session. On the road, about two weeks a month I am in a different city, hotel room, and found it very difficult to find that peace last night — I finally just gave up — the PC had a bad connection and you weren’t “there” on my pc to talk me into my good place
— no pillow — no quiet spot — last night at disney where the music outside during their evening celebration was loud — any hints for those of us who have to find a new “place” to meditate that is different at every venue?
Hi Jackie. Glad to know we’re practicing together.
It IS hard to practice on the road, there is no doubt. Luckily, in our practice there is no need to find peace in order to sit. It is very practical that way! Instead, we could spend a few minutes relaxing with things as they are. If you sit to practice but it is noisy, don’t try to fight it. When you find you are absorbed in the sound (or irritation at the sound), try to label that “thinking,” let go, and come back to your breath. If you are unable to find a comfortable place to sit as you are used to back home, sit on a chair, the floor, or you could even lie down in bed. Then just resume the technique or resting attention breath and, as you become distracted by discomforts and lose the connection to your breath, simply label it “thinking,” let go, and come back.
You can always just come back!
Finally, if you are simply unable to practice because you are too uncomfortable, cranky, and/or tired, allow your mind to just remember what it feels like to meditate. This is called “flashing” on the mind of meditation. It happens in a moment. It is great. It totally counts!
Hope this is useful? With love, Susan
Very useful, thank you. I guess I have been “flashing” fairly often too as I find myself to busy to be still, but thinking about what it feels like, and I find that helps too.
I will try again this evening — maybe before the fireworks
again, thanks — this is the most “peace” I have had within myself in some time — I am so glad my friend showed me your website,
love back at you,
jackie
Flash on! And glad to know we’re practicing together. xo S
Today’s instruction on meditation was so insightful for me. Thank you.
So glad to hear this, Karoline.
Susan, thanks! It’s so refreshing to hear you, over and over again, that “The biggest misconception of all time about meditation is that it means you’re supposed to stop thinking and “clear the mind of thought.”
I’ve known this for a long time, but have felt unsupported in this until I started working with your meditation teaching. Until now, I got the opposite message from my teachers, that I had to achieve “void in the head,” which for me is nearly impossible for more than a few seconds at a time.
What I do get, when I relax into this, is the ability to tune out the subject matter of my thoughts so that it often turns into what I describe as a radio station that’s not quite tuned in. Noise, quiet-ish noise, but indecipherable enough that I don’t get hooked.
And now, when I do get hooked (because I’m not perfect, yo!) I can just say to myself “Thinking,” and move on.
I appreciate you!
Love and light,
Sue
It sounds to me like your practice is going very well, Sue. And I love your description of thought as like “a radion station that is not quite tuned in.” That is so perfect.
Glad you like the image, and thanks for the loving feedback.
Oh goddess, it’s late and my grammar skills have flown away. What the first paragraph should have said is:
Susan, thanks! It’s so refreshing to hear you say, over and over again, that “The biggest misconception of all time about meditation is that it means you’re supposed to stop thinking and ‘clear the mind of thought’.”
Enough of me! Off to bed.
Very useful information. Thanks so much! I am new to meditation and am enjoying it! I just finished a great book that has helped me quite a bit. It is called, ” A Country Where All Colors Are Sacred and Alive” by author Geoffrey Oelsner. It empowers people to consider the possibility that we can have some degree of positive impact on environmental well-being through prayer, meditation, attunement to nature, and so forth. http://geoffoelsner.com/
Thanks for sharing what has benefitted you!
Can you say something about “mantras”? (Or did you cover it before? Is there some way to look at old “episodes” ?)
Mike, thanks for asking about mantras. No, I haven’t covered it before. But it’s a great idea and I will post about it next week. Thanks, Susan
Hi Susan,
Thanks for the great post. I’m curious about the part where you say “once you relax, you see that your mind is so much vaster and more beautiful and brilliant than you ever imagined.” Can you share a little more about that? I have yet to get a glimpse of this vast and wonderful landscape.
Hi Mara. I would love to share some more about this. Let me think about how to do so. It probably wouldn’t be helpful for me to try to describe or define anything–everyone’s experience is so personal. But there must be some way to delve into this topic–stay tuned… xo S
Susan, you read my mind! Being new to meditation and your forum, I figured that you had most definitely already created posts on the basics. I just hadn’t had a chance to find them. So, thank you for revisiting the basics for those of us who are new. And for those of us who have been here for awhile, sometimes it is not such a bad thing to revisit the basics. Smiles!
Tracey, I’m thrilled to get this feedback. I (re)created this post with someone exactly like you in mind! Please do let me know if you have any questions going forward– Warmly, S
Hello…my web surfing somehow (?) found you and this site and I want to express my gratitude/appreciation for feeling supported by your work in my old meditation practice. I learned the Transcendental Meditation practice in 1971 and meditated 2x’s per day for many years and now meditate every morning before breakfast for 20 mins. I notice that my practice has “evolved” over those 41 years to include breath work and mindfulness while my originally learned mantra is humming along in the “background”. This is not a “formula” as much as a guide. I’m ready for it all to evolve, or not, some more in time. The idea of practicing with eyes open never occured to me until reading your instructions. I must give that its turn and “see”…. btw – I think my experience of being an est trainer for 5 years in the 70′s and a high school psychology teacher and counselor – and lifelong student of eastern philosophy and traveler in India and SE Asia – also has contributed to my attraction and commitment to meditative practices. Lastly, my evolved practice includes a gradual reduction of those tendencies to be meditating “perfectly” or looking for “results”, etc. I bring that up to “normalize” these tendencies for those starting to meditate. And, those thoughts can occur again at any moment. Surrendering to what is seems to be the key to having it work…just as in life.
Hi Gordon. Let me know how it goes!
Thank you, thank you, thank you. True to the proverb “When the student is ready the teacher will appear.” I found you a little over 2 years ago on Huffington Post . Like most new endeavors I just stared meditating after some research and let the process itself inform me and shape my practice. So, this dense little synopsis of the basics is particularly helpful and appreciated. I hope your well-deserved break was lovely Susan and I’m grateful your back too!
So glad this was useful, Maggie and for the kind words!