be fearless.

dream big.

love a lot.

I believe in supreme openheartedness, agenda-less curiosity, outrageously precise creative self-expression, and, most of all, walking the path of kindness.I believe in kindness as the ultimate expression of our intelligence.

The power of kindness can give us the world we dream of living in. Much more than being “nice,” kindness is a skillful means of the highest order. To be truly kind, we have to be truly aware. We have to be able to see clearly.

 

rules i try to live by.
1. I recognize that only by being aware in the present moment will I know which kind of kind to be and so acknowledge that the path of mindfulness-awareness and the path of kindness are inseparable.

2. I will exhibit extreme good manners, even when no one is watching. Good manners include (but are not limited to) qualities such as friendliness, generosity, patience, discipline, respect, discernment, dressing appropriately, and always, always cleaning up after myself.

3. When encountering those who disagree with me I will continue to view and treat them as human, no matter how barbaric or threatening I find them to be. This means not wishing they were dead or thinking such things as: The world would be so awesome were it not for _______ (you, me, Sarah Palin, Michael Palin, Islamists, Feitishists, Night fears, Stephen Frears, Darwinians, North Carolinians, Psychiatrists, Physiatrists, Bad drivers, Noisy neighbors, Townies, Junkies, Flunkies, Spelunkers, Circus Buskers, People who like Justin Bieber, and so on).

4. I will practice speaking clearly, honestly, and skillfully, which also means knowing when to shut up. When others are speaking, I will not use that time to think of what I will say next, but will instead give myself over to listening completely, fully, and properly.

5. I acknowledge that love is the most important thing in life and vow to give my heart away at the slightest provocation.

now.

I'm interested in extreme self-knowledge, the Buddhadharma, relationships of all kinds, creativity, the Enneagram, and using every single day to become a more truthful version of who I already am.

1. I write. I have written 5 books and may be working on a 6th. I also write on my own blog and for the Huffington Post, as well as for others who ask me to say what I think. It is my great good fortune to spend my days sitting alone at my desk, asking myself what I think of various things and then writing it down.

2. I practice. I have been a Buddhist practitioner since 1995, which is when I took formal refuge vows in the Shambhala Buddhist lineage. Chogyam Trungpa introduced me to the dharma and Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche is my beloved teacher. I practice formal sitting meditation, acting right, being nice, digging deep, and forgiving myself when I screw up.

3. I study. I graduated from seminary in my lineage in 2004 and continue to find great joy from ongoing study and practice of the Buddhadharma.

4. I teach. I’ve been authorized to teach meditation since 2006. I have some individual students, but mostly I teach by offering workshops on working with strong emotions, healing a broken heart, and writing.

5. I speak. ...at dharma centers, bookstores, and to groups, from Harvard Medical School’s Dept of Continuing Ed to Women’s Leadership Conventions to writing conferences. If you’d like me to speak to your group, email me. That would be awesome.

 

then.
I did not go to college. This has turned out to matter. NOT.

I spent over a decade in the music business, working in publicity, sales and marketing, international rights management, and general senior management positions at recording companies such as Antone’s Records, Rykodisc, Rounder, and Tommy Boy. Music is central to my enjoyment of life and forms the basis for my unshakeable belief in the goodness of humankind.

I have worked as a book packager. My company is called Padma Media, Inc. Padma is Sanskrit for lotus and my company is named for this crazy beautiful blossom whose roots are in mud. All my projects are all meant to mimic that continuum.

My first book, The Hard Questions: 100 Essential Questions to Ask Before You Say “I Do” came out in 2002 and was on the New York Times bestseller list for a solid nine weeks at #2 and then for several more weeks at not #2. That it was published at all was a fluke. I wrote it because I was getting married and found that the only books on the topic were basically about what to wear. I ran into a publisher friend and he said, "sure, I'll look at a proposal." Thank you, Joel at Tarcher.

Because that book did so well, I got to write other books, but it wasn't until my 4th book, How Not to Be Afraid of Your Own Life, published by the wonderful St. Martin’s Press, that I began to find my voice. (Shout out to Lisa, Matthew, Sally, & 3 Johns.) My newest book, The Wisdom of a Broken Heart (published by the also-wonderful Free Press/Simon & Schuster) is, for me, a continuing evolution of that voice. (Shout out to Leslie, Dominick, Donna, Heidi. And Stephanie.)

I'm overjoyed to have been on Oprah, The Tyra Banks Show, the TODAY show, CBS Early Show (hey, GMA, what's up?!), CNN, and more. My work has been featured in Oprah magazine (love you, O woman), TIME magazine, The Wall Street Journal, the New York TImes, Parade, SELF, the Shambhala Sun, and others.

 

next.
I think my next book will be about marriage vows, although it might be about the Enneagram. Or meditation. Possibly Buddhism & creativity. I get confused and overwhelmed by ideas. If you have a vote, do let me know.

 

connect.

If you want to hire me for speaking, writing, teaching, or any other kind of gig that allows me to exercise right speech & right listening, I would be delighted.

Email is BY FAR the best way to reach me : susan@susanpiver.com

You could try to phone me, but I hate to talk on the phone, however sometimes it’s necessary and I don’t hate it that much: 917.232.2035

Note: I totally and completely read every single email I get. I appreciate hearing from you so much. I definitely write back. Eventually. So if you have emailed me, please be patient.You will hear back from me. I wish I could say the same about phone calls, but I can't. Email is best!!!

Other ways we could connect:
Twitter. I am in love with Twitter.
Facebook. Friend me and I’ll friend you back.
Facebook Fan Page. Get announcements, talk with others, ask me questions, and so on.
My blog. Please click on RSS feed to get my latest posts and you have to know how much I love it when people comment. Love.
Huffington Post. I blog for them several times per month.

Memo from the TMI dept: 25 Random Things About Me