A show of hands, please. What do you believe in? What are your values? What do you believe is at the heart of human nature?

What kind of world do you want to live in?

Here is what I say.

There are more people who want to act out love than hate.

There are more people who are neither Red nor Blue, no matter where they live.

There are way more people who are not fundamentalist than those who are.

There are more people who prize the values of tolerance, openness, and friendship over money, consumerism, and dogma.

There are more people who want our leaders and institutions to make the health and safety of our bodies and our planet their first priority than there are those who want to pillage both for their own benefit.

There are more of us who are willing to make some sacrifices for the greater good and than those who believe we are in this alone.

We stand by the principle that all persons have the right to choose their own belief system as long as it does not include violence against others.

We hold achievement and abundance as high priorities, but not at the expense of family, friendship, love, joy, raising healthy children, and the creation of a world of opportunity for all.

These—family, love, self-expression, creating goodness for ourselves and others, and tolerance—are the true American values. Beyond this, they are human values.

We want to restore sanity to our systems of governance, education, and commerce. We can do it because wherever lives a person who wants to abuse or kill others, there are countless others who do not.

For every businessperson who lines his or her pockets at the expense of others (or even of our very planet), there are five who give back.

For every self-interested, disingenuous politician, there are ten who would take elective office for the greater good.

And for every cynic who believes that power-grabbing and violence are simply human nature, that any person in position of power or influence would turn on his fellow man, I say there are a million who try to do otherwise everyday. I am one. You are too.

A show of hands, please.

This lovely meditation from Sakyong Mipham has been so healing for me. I invite you to share in it.

It was so much fun to co-teach with the excellent Ethan Nichtern, Buddhist teacher, author, activist, and pal at the New York Shambhala Center. Here is a podcast of the evening.

PS I’m teaching there April 12-14. Shambhala Training: Level 1.

Honored and delighted to sit down for a conversation with Jesse Jacobs, the founder of Samovar Tea Lounges in San Francisco.

We discussed:

• how I flunked 8th grade, never went to college—and then published six books including a New York Times bestseller
• how I overcame her phobia of flying through the kindness of strangers
• how I went from Austin cocktail waitress to music industry executive
• advice for recent college grads and anyone in the job market
• advice on love, heart break, and things to consider before tying the knot
• how I flunked meditation instruction—and then went on to launch The Open Heart Project: an unconventional meditation school

Which I really enjoyed! In which we covered the following:

During our soulful, in-depth conversation (listen here), we covered:

• Her work as a teacher, writer, and blogger interested in “extreme self knowledge” and“becoming a more truthful version of who I already am.”

• Reading psychology books at the library at 10 years old and feeling like she never fit in.

• Working as a cab driver in Boston and the“Noble Quest” she embarked on after she heard a Bruce Springsteen song that called to her!

• The”auspicious coincidence” of discovering the book “The Heart of the Buddha” By Chogyam Trungpa in 1995 and how that changed her life.

• Meditation: what is it, misconceptions, what you can expect, and can you “stop” thinking?

• What is “dharma”, “stupefaction“, and how does she gain access to the truth.

• “The bad news is your falling through the air. No parachute, nothing to hold on to. The good news is there is no ground!”

• The Open Heart Project- an online meditation project with more than 10,000 participants.

• The tools she uses in her practice, upcoming workshops she’s teaching, and MUCH more!

Last week, I blogged about vulnerability as a path. In other words, it’s not simply a choiceless state of being (we are vulnerable), it is a point of view. A stance. A way. In fact, it may be the only way to solve the problems our world faces. We could at least consider that. I mean nothing else has ever worked. Warfare, peace talks, diplomacy, terrorist attacks, charity, politics, activism…some of these things are really great and some are completely heinous. Nonetheless, they have not created peace in our world.

Could it be that we are going about it all wrong? Continue

“The only true elegance is vulnerability.” Chogyam Trungpa

Thank goodness for Brené Brown and that Ted talk on vulnerability. That over 7m people have watched is pretty mind blowing and pretty fantastic. What, I have wondered, was in those 7m+ minds as they clicked “play” or “forward” or “replay”? Were they looking for some recognition for their inner experience? Did they want their friends and family to understand something they had been trying to communicate for a long time? Did they want to reassure loved ones that it is okay to feel? Did they want to be reminded again and again that what is sweetest and most tender about them is also a source of power? 

I don’t know, but I have certainly felt all of these things in connection with that talk and this topic altogether. I’ve longed to be respected rather than doubted for my sensitivity. I’ve wanted to assure so many people—loved ones, readers, students—that their sorrows and fears are gateways to wisdom and brilliance. And I’ve needed continual support for the view that, okay, the meek may inherit the earth, but first they must protect it and ensure its survival. They are the only ones who can do it. Continue

Hello, all. Inspired by Jonathan Fields, I wrote this annual report to try to make sense of 2012 and clarify my direction for 2013. Writing it was very instructive. I reviewed what worked, what failed, what influenced me, and where I plan to go creatively, spiritually, and professionally. Even though this report is about me, I hope you will find it beneficial to read.

Here’s to a year of brilliance and peace, Susan

If you feel moved to share it, here is the direct link.

It is almost impossible, no, it is impossible, to have any idea how to react to a tragedy as profound and senseless as the one that occurred today at an elementary school in Connecticut. It is impossible to grasp.

I’m sure that, like me, many of you have been crying all day.

An event this horrific causes us to see that all of our normal coping mechanisms are inadequate. We turn to each one—blame, hiding, medicating—and each one fails.

Nothing can make this okay. There is no explanation that helps. Blaming lack of gun control, insufficient guns, or inadequate mental health care may be entirely reasonable and valid, but it doesn’t matter. No matter how right you are (or aren’t), it doesn’t change the grief, rage, or numbness.

Using ideas to treat or metabolize feelings doesn’t work.

Then what? I’m afraid that there is not much we can do other than to be absolutely, irredeemably heartbroken. It turns out that this is helpful. Weep, sob, rage. Weep, sob, rage. Every time your mind tries to tell you, “this is because of poor gun control,” or “this world is rotten, terrible and I have to ignore it in order to survive,” and/or “if mental healthcare was better, we could help people before they explode into violence,” please ask it to wait. I’m not saying we shouldn’t act. WE SHOULD. But before we act, we should feel. Allow your heart to break. Let down your guard. There is strange redemption in heartbreak. Continue

As you may know, I am a writer and blogger. I have written six books and send out a newsletter twice a week to my list of nearly 10000 subscribers. My topics include meditation, creativity, and relationships. I’m fortunate to have an active, caring audience and when I upload a post, it may get 10 to 100 comments, depending on the topic. Most of the comments, if I may say, are some expression of gratitude because the reader has found this work useful. Occasionally, of course, someone will really disagree with me. Comments such as, “I can’t believe you think something so strange, but to each his own,” or “This post is misleading, please be more responsible in the future” are not unheard of. Being called a “self-absorbed navel-gazer” (which is probably true) is considered a vicious insult on my site.

However, a post I wrote on May 2, 2011 went viral and garnered thousands of comments, many of which were filled with vitriol and ridicule. “You are destroying our country, you f**king idiot,” “If you spent one day in the real world, you would probably get killed—good riddance.” And my favorite: “If these baboons had gotten their hands on nuclear weapons—you wouldn’t be sitting at your pretty little Mac going on about how conflicted you are.” (I am a Mac user—how did they know?!) Continue